Article by John Parks | Photography by John Morin | Owl Staff
The only thing harder than waking up after a late-night-bender is finding a way to make it to work or class on time and in “style.”
Being lazy and stylish can be hard while rummaging through the hamper to find something that’s not too wrinkled to pass as clean. Do we have time to iron that shirt? Toss our wrinkled pants in the dryer, or bathe ourselves in Febreze? Probably not, but as men we have a duty to take the easy way out so we can look presentable and be on time.
These thoughts run through a typical guy’s mind just about every morning. Finding a socially passable outfit and masking that wet trash smell of yours while trying to be punctual is stressful for all of us. However, overcoming your inner laziness is not far from our reach with some of my advice.
Business Administration major Cameron Grier says, “If I can’t find something to wear, I’ll just grab something that’s marginally cleaner from my brother’s room. It might not fit, but at least it’s clean.”
Looking hip isn’t even all that hard nowadays. Most fashionable looks can be found at thrift stores, garage sales, or even that old chest in your grandmom’s attic that’s full of your weird uncle’s clothing from the ‘80s. Pop on some out-of-date clothing, put your hands in your pockets, lean on a wall like a J. Crew model and you’ll be straight swagging.
Unlike us men, women spend entirely too much time getting prepared. According to a study done by the Harley Street Clinic, women spend up to a year and three months of their lives applying makeup alone.
“The only thing harder than waking up after a late-night-bender is finding a way to make it to work or class on time and in style.”
I can say with profound confidence that I have spent a maximum of about four hours or less getting ready in my entire life while still managing to look fantastic.
When it comes to our hair, getting it cut is usually optional, provided that your employer doesn’t really care about what you look like. Using conditioner is usually completely unnecessary for most occasions. Fortunately, rocking a tight fedora cap is an amazing way to cover that mop top you consider to be a haircut.
If you’re really in a tight spot, tossing some quasi-clean clothing in the dryer with a damp towel can remove wrinkles within a few minutes while you rush to shower and brush your teeth. Using this method can cut down on time that would otherwise be wasted on un-manly things like “ironing” and “folding clothes.” Who has time for all that? We’re men, and we’re busy.